In love, trust, in the joy of life, of being..

„ I feel so deeply wrapped in my own warmth.

In love, trust, in the joy of life, of being.

It wasn’t always like this.

Because... I didn’t know how to trust myself.

Because... I couldn’t feel myself.

Because... I didn’t want to feel myself... truly...

To feel what I can give myself, just like that.

In the eternal rush of life, just to forget who is standing here.

Who I am...

Between everything and nothing.

The absolute chase toward not feeling.

To another day that led to happiness, but not in its full essence.

And at the same time, feeling and full awareness.

That I was born for SOMETHING.

That something... started to resonate.

And THAT... had been with me all along.

But for a long time, I wasn’t able to hear the whisper of my intuition.

The whisper of my soul.

Which spoke, held a monologue.

With such great patience.

Thank you for waiting.

Thank you, my dear…“

I wrote this letter, this poem, to myself some time ago, because in October 2023, I felt that I had finally emerged from the dark basement, the feeling of not being enough, of needing more confirmation from someone, something, that I’m worthy enough to be able to... do something... in the constant chase. Until finally, I fell... into my own basement, not as a guest, but to look at what was there. Truly.. without judgement of myself. But a one word.. in my mind and a deep feeling that I want to - Nurture myself.. Deeply, finally.

Thousands of conversations with you, ladies.. Consultations…

And I’m sharing this very personal moment with you here because I want you to know that each of us goes through our own processes, which every day allow us to be ourselves, closer to ourselves, even if now you feel sad for a long time, can’t get out of that state, it’s not easy—I know.

I wanted to share with you that I went through it too, and I still go through it at times.

Because these are just the next stages of our lives. That’s just how it is.

In life, it’s worth looking even deeper into YOURSELF. To be closer to yourself.

I want to tell you that it’s worth being sovereign with yourself.

To support yourself, to be understanding, even from a place of the deepest pain, Of traumas. Unvoiced emotions, unspoken words.

Because you had to face something back then, and FREEZE.

Yourself, in order to save others.

In order to—survive—in those conditions.

Or to tolerate for years what you truly never wanted.

You stayed where it was uncomfortable, so it wouldn’t get even worse... For a moment.

Because it couldn’t function otherwise back then.

You didn’t have the right to speak...

Or maybe you did, but you weren’t able to utter a word.

Exactly...

That basement was all the masks/programs/obligations 🎭

That school, society, rules imposed on me, least of all my parents.

I hadn’t been there in a long time... And sometimes I return, just like that, to look, with gratitude, even deeper.

I wanted to share today, What I’ve learned... by this season.

To practice the wild dance of love and joy, where chills run through my body, because I finally feel an even greater power in who I am. Because I finally feel myself, and not someone else’s expectations to fulfill, just to feel loved

I’ve learned to trust myself, to trust my whispering intuition.

I’ve learned to feel. My body.

I’ve learned to stand tall with gratitude, even if everything is burning and crashing down like dominoes.

I’ve learned to fall and rise with immense gratitude for every little thing, for nature with a big heart.

And finally... I’ve learned to BE—to be closer to myself, in joy, in love.

I understood that I was always like this..

Even though I was never lacking in that childlike love, I just had to awaken it within myself again.

And how is it with you?

Where are you now?

Which Season of life is it for you?

Thank you for being here.

I feel honoured that you share with me the seed of your life.

Aleksandra